PSA: This story contains coarse language and adult themes. Viewer discretion advised.
Wed., Jan. 3
Hey, how are you?
Im well, n u?
(I’m actually a little indifferent, but whatever.)
What u doin?
(Are you masturbating? It would help me reach my goal quicker…)
Not much, just playing a game
(I’m playing Grand Theft Auto IV for the third time round. Which explains why I haven’t moved out of my parents house even though I’m 20.)
What you doing up this late?
(I got bored of GTA. Also, are you expecting me to hold this conversation?)
Im a bit toey
(I think “toey” sounds less frank than “horny”. Just playing my cards right…)
(How original. But you do look nice naked. I like a guy who’s slim and hairless.)
(I really mean that. Even though it sounds like a stock reply.)
(You’re like the fiftieth guy who has said that to me since I downloaded this bloody app. Sometimes I didn’t even send them anything, not even a message, and they still thought I was hot. It was weird. But, a compliment is a compliment.)
Top or bottom?
(Let’s get this over with…)
(This other guy just started messaging me back, hence the short answers. Just playing my cards right.)
Your ass looks hot
(I’m now slightly interested)
Where are you?
(Oh fuck it, I’m horny as hell. And it’s been at least a month since I last got laid.)
Not too far
(Actually, it is a little far for me at this time of night, but my interest is piqued and my loins are stirring. Also, did I mention it’s been a while?)
(The other guy won’t talk to me now after I sent him my nudes. I feel awful, but since you’re interested I want to make up for my slightly bruised ego. I would also like to feel the shape of your dick inside me.)
I’ll shower and come over now
(I’ll wash the important parts under the basin sink in the bathroom and then spray on some antiperspirant.)
You have condoms?
(I used up my last one two weeks ago and I’ve been meaning to get some more. Besides, you initiated this conversation, so it’s only fair that you provide the goods. I want to use it this time, too, unlike what happened with that last guy I fucked. But he was on PrEP, so it doesn’t really matter. “Herd immunity” or something like that. I read it up online a couple of months ago.)
(Third drawer. Accompanied by a half-filled bottle of water-based lube and a fresh bottle of amyl which I hope you don’t mind me using.)
Nice. I’m leaving now
(I’ve just finished washing myself under the basin sink. I’ll be leaving in a minute.)
What u wearing?
(I need reassurance and so does my flaccid dick.)
Short shorts and a singlet
(I’ve been in these clothes all day. Why change into something new when I’m coming over yours to take them off anyway? Besides, I didn’t do much physical exercise today, so I haven’t sweated in them.)
What about you?
(I’m not really interested in your attire, but since you asked first I thought it was only fair to return the question.)
Trackies and singlet
(I’m freeballing right now and I hope you like it. It feels good when my circumcised cock rubs freely against the inside fabric.)
Where r u?
(My libido won’t last forever, you know…)
(I hope you haven’t changed your mind like that guy I wanted to sleep with three weeks ago. It’s a real shitter to be left in the lurch. If you have changed your mind, let me know now so I can at least finish myself off and go to bed.)
Just got on the train. I’m so horny right now
(Sorry about the delay, my parents got home just as I was leaving. They were wondering why I was heading out at this time of night on a Wednesday. I’m not actually out to any of my family, so I had to make up a lie that my friend Joey, who lives two blocks over, is feeling down and wanted some company. I then had to call my friend Joey to tell him what I said so that he knows to lie if they call him up to ask. Thankfully Joey lives with two housemates now and not his family, so my parents can’t call them up on a landline. Also, I’m not really entirely horny, but I am desperate for a good fuck. I’m just saying that I am so you don’t feel discouraged.)
Message me when u r out front.
(I was considering letting you walk in, but I am very wary now. I’m making you message me when you are near so I can see if you look like you do in the pictures through the closed curtain. Can’t be too careful.)
Are you clean?
(Last thing I want is to catch something and then have my parents find out.)
I got tested a week ago. All neg. But my mind isn’t clean 😉
(I’m subtly trying to teach you to use the right words and phrases when indirectly referring to people living with HIV. People living with HIV are not dirty, as you indirectly point out. Perhaps you should say “have you recently got tested?” or “do you have any STIs?”. Either of those would be better than “are you clean?” So rude. )
How far awy r u?
(My balls are turning blue.)
I’m out front
(My heart is racing a little bit. I’m anxious in both meanings of the word. I hope this is going to be good and not awkward.)
Com to unit 5
(And hurry too. My semi-hard erection is waiting. I hope you like it pitching a tent in my trackies. It’s all yours, as is my arse that’s aching for penetration.)
(And soon I’ll be coming on you. Or in you with the condom on. As I walk up these stairs, I’ll get the idea of unzipping my fly and letting it hang out just for you to notice when you open the door. But I know I’ll never do it. God I can’t wait to let it slip inside you, nor can I wait to touch that beautiful arse off yours.)
Thurs., Jan. 4
Sorry if I kept you up. You have such a nice ass
(Please put me out of my misery. I’m a little worried that you would consider it rape, which was totally not my intention. If you said no I would have stopped, but you only grimaced a little. I think you were sleeping and you didn’t want to be woken up, or something like that. I was only grinding my cock up your backside and letting it poke your hole. I didn’t put it in.)
(Please reply. I feel so bad.)
Hey, its cool.
(I’m actually quite tired today because you woke me up twice. First with your grinding, which I sort of liked, and then when you had to finish yourself off masturbating. I sensed that you tried to do it without shaking the bed, but I’m a light sleeper. Anyway, whatever, it’s just a hookup.)
Cool. Just wanted to be sure.
What’s your name btw?
(Not the first time this happened. Sometimes it’s just sex and that’s all you care about.)
Sat., Jan. 6
Hey, how are you?
(I know your online right now.)
Hey, Im ok
(I’m about to sleep. I’m guessing you’re not.)
Cool, I’m on my way home
(…from drinking. I’m a little tipsy right now, which I hope you don’t mind.)
(My eyelids just fell for a second. I’m nearing the end of my focus. I also suspect you are drunk.)
What you doing?
(Please say that you’re toey. Cause I am.)
(…about to sleep.)
(Want to have crazy sex like we did three days ago?)
I’m so horny!
(This is your last chance at getting some action with me, because I’ve just got off the nightrider and I’m nearly five minutes away from home. Once I unlock the door I won’t be able to go back out again. Not if I have a good reason that my parents will believe.)
Tues., Jan. 9
Sorry, fell asleep
(I did that on purpose; I knew you’d be hounding me for sex. I have half an hour to get to work.)
(Well, I fucked up a good bit of ongoing sex right there.)
Fri., Apr. 13
Hey, your close
Yeah, just at stonewall.
(…dealing with this weird guy who won’t take the hint.)
Cool, ground floor?
(I seem to not be getting anywhere with guys tonight. Hanging with you sounds more fun.)
Nah, second floor. Come up
(…and save me from this guy.)
Next to the bar?
Yeah, wearing a pink singlet
(I’m walking there now in hopes to get away from said creepy guy.)
(Wish I could take that off again.)
Just getting a drink.
Sat., Apr. 14
Come to my stall
(I only wanted to go to the toilet so I can get you in here for some fun. Bathroom sex is hot. Mmm, I’m so hard.)
Have you tested recently?
(I wasn’t planning on fucking without a condom, but I was so in the mood. I’m always careful and now I’m worried.)
(This is serious!)
Hey, I’m actually due for a test. Will do one monday.
(It’s been maybe six months?)
Do you use condoms?
(Trying to find some reassurance here.)
Most of the time.
(Accidentally slipped it in once when grinding this guy. And there was that other guy I fucked bareback, but he was on PrEP. Every other time I’m careful.)
Mon., Apr. 16
Did you get tested?
Tues., Apr. 17
(Please tell me you have. I got tested today and I’m so fucking worried.)
I’ll let you know the results
(Calm down. Your starting to freak me out. The chance that we have HIV is low because there has to be blood to blood contact. I know that your pretty loose down there, so it’s less likely we’ve shared that. Also, I don’t have any symptoms.)
I got tested myself
Cool, let me know your results
Thurs., Apr. 19
I’m all clear.
(I’m also packed out with condoms thanks to the nurse giving me a showbag full of them at the clinic. What a way to make me feel like a slut.)
(That’s sort of a relief. I’m still waiting on my results.)
Fri., Apr. 20
All neg for me, thank god
(I’m so fucking relieved. There was a moment there where I was worried about what it would be like to tell you I have HIV and that you should get tested again. I’m gonna have a bottle of Merlot to celebrate.)
That’s good news
(I had a vibe that was gonna happen.)
Does that mean we can fuck bb? 😛
(That was very spur of the moment just then. I hope you like the joke? Although, I say joke, but I wouldn’t mind doing it. I’ll consider this option.)
Haha, culd be fun
Sun., July 8
Hey, what you doing?
Hey, about to sleep
Fri., Aug. 3
Hey, how are you?
(God, I was just thinking about you.)
I’m ok, n u?
Cool. I’m on Prep now
(wink wink, nudge nudge.)
Nice. I should get on it
(I’d like to, but then I’d have to somehow explain to my parents why I’m on it. And I’m not prepared to tell them I’m gay yet.)
Does that mean I can fuck you bb then? 😛
(Depending on how you react, this is either a joke or a tease.)
Haha, yeah sure
(Just being casual. Smooth and carefree. Don’t wanna come across as too eager.)
What you doing now?
(Wanna bb me now? I’ve been getting into condomless sex. This other guy fucked me recently and it felt so much better. He had a nice shape, too.)
Chilling at home, day off from uni
(I want sex, but it’d be nice to get to know each other a bit more. I want you to know more about me.)
Nice, what you studying?
(I didn’t know I was fucking a smart guy? How awesome.)
(Can we talk about this later? I’m really horny right now.)
Wanna come over?
Yeah. I’ll leave now
(I’m making a mental note in my mind to make sure we chat after sex.)
What you wearing?
Trackies, shirt and jumper
I’m out front
Tues., Aug. 14
Hey, how are you?
(After our last sexual escapade and subsequent conversation and cuddles after, I feel I can be a little more blunt with you.)
Nice. Same here
(That dirty talk is such a turn on.)
(I like this dirty talk.)
Yeah, come over
Where r u?
Wed., Aug. 22
Missing your cock
Want me to come over? I’ve just finished class
I’ll be there soon. Getting lunch now
The door’s ajar
I’ll message you when I get off the train
Off the train
I’m waiting inside 😉
Mon., Sept. 3
Hey, how are you?
You should get tested. I got Gonorrhea. It’s nothing serious. Treatment is easy and it’s curable.
(I feel so shit right now for having to say this. My heart cannot cope with the stress. I’m expecting a verbal bashing from you.)
(Fuck. Thank god it’s only that. Hopefully the treatment isn’t hard. Don’t want mum and dad to find out.)
Thanks for letting me know
(I should have been more careful. We should have not fucked bareback. Oh well, have to just get treated. Can’t waste time complaining.)
Tues., Sept. 4
Hey, did you get tested?
(Please don’t hate me. I feel so awful about all this.)
(I can sense you hate me.)
Sorry about this
(I didn’t know how painful the shot in the arse would be like. I’m currently hobbling to the bus stop to go home.)
Ok. Did they treat you?
(At least you’re replying.)
(I’m not gonna push. I can feel your resentment and I don’t blame you.)
Wed., Sept. 5
How are you feeling?
(I’m not, actually. I was hoping that mum and dad would be at work when I got home, but they got back early because they were celebrating their anniversary. When I walked inside they noticed I was hobbling and wouldn’t stop questioning me about it. I told them I just had to get an injection for antibiotics, which raised more questions. Eventually I told them I had Gonorrhea and I got treated for it. My dad asked if I was a faggot and I ran to my room, only for them both to follow. Dad told me that he could never have a faggot like me live under his roof. Thankfully mum was a sympathetic, even though she still loved my dad. She drove me to her best friend’s house and it’s here I’ll be living until I finish uni. Mum said she’ll keep in touch and she’ll try talk some sense into my dad. I told her I don’t want to have anything to do with him after what he thinks of me. And I don’t want to tell you any of this because I don’t want you to feel bad. It’s not your fault. I should have been more careful. In saying that, I don’t think we will ever have sex again.)
Sat., Sept. 8
Hey, how are you?
Tues., Sept. 11
Hey, you should be cured now
Wanna have fun?
We can wear condoms
Have you moved?
I know your online
(I give up. I know I fucked up, which is why you won’t talk to me anymore. I miss our sex and I miss our cuddles and conversations after. I miss our dirty talk as much as I miss learning all about this intelligent guy who’s been fucking me for the past couple of months. And now, for my sake, I need to move on. You haven’t blocked me, so I see that is a good sign, but you won’t talk to me. I won’t block you, but I won’t stay around waiting for you to reply. I cannot hang around and drown myself in self-pity. I wish you all the best, but I won’t say that because I don’t know if you really want to hear it from me. So all I’ll give you is these two words that I hope mean something, just like all the words we’ve shared together these past few months. These words are also my way of saying goodbye. But I don’t want it to be goodbye forever, just a goodbye for another. Our “chat later” or “see you around”. I hope we do. But I’m not hanging around to find out.)
I really am
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